Obviously, things have not started off too well in 2008 :P. I know that this is not a lot of hands, but still, it's been 2 weeks since my last winning session, and 2 weeks is 2 weeks.
In a way, this is going to be a little bit of a brag post, strange as it seems. The brag is in the way that I have been handling this at the tables. I'm usually good about not carrying around any negative emotions for too long after a session. But I do have a decent amount of work to do in limiting the effects of a bad run while sitting in the game. I've been on the wrong end of draws getting there and long shots beating me a fair amount this week, but I am shrugging it off better than usual for me. I haven't been ideal, but I've let go of frustration a number of times before the guy who just got there's stack has incremented. It's a significant step in the right direction, at least for me, in a continuing quest for simple acceptance of a bad result.
I've actually been thinking about what it takes to get to true and total acceptance of your bad results at the table. The kind of acceptance where they affect you as little as humanly possible, whatever that may be. I'm starting to think that I'm not sure I want to get to that total acceptance, even if I could. The reason: I think it would take some fun out of the times that I do well. I just don't see being totally dispassionate about your losses yet still relishing your victories. If I were a pro and/or played at much higher stakes, it might be more important. But if so, it would change the significance of my motivating factors. Namely, the element of fun would be reduced. I'm not saying that pros and high stakes players don't have fun, but the emphasis changes.
There are a number of different poker aspects that can be fun, by the way. It's fun for me to work my way through a problem away from the tables, whether or not I was in a hand, whether or not I won the hand. It's fun chatting with other guys about their poker successes. But I'm talking about the fun of playing a hand and profiting. Not Sklansky bucks or G-bucks, but real profit. I'm not playing for life-changing money. But it's still more fun to win than to lose for me. And that's not only OK, it's good (to maybe paraphrase Tommy Angelo, it's good because I choose it).
So, if I enjoy the winning of a pot and don't enjoy the losing of a pot, and want to continue attaching some emotional meaning to it because I like that meaning, I really need to make sure that it minimizes any impact on my future hands...and elation can be as harmful as despair. The trick for me is to compartmentalize those feelings...to on one level enjoy/hate the outcome of the hand, and on another level...the get-ready-for-the-next-hand level....to ignore the outcome. And that's what I've been doing for the most part over this brief little slide.
My play, for the most part, has been decent, IMO. Last night, in an absolutely card-brutal session, I only made one significant mistake. To be fair, it was a pretty big one, and I also made a number of smaller mistakes. And to be more fair, I'm sure there were other mistakes I made that I didn't detect upon review. But those are always there. I uttered a couple one-word profanities, but was ready to go the next hand both times, and one of them the next hand was kind of tricky and I got max value. The only time I really cost myself something on the next hand was when I was on a steal, hit top two, and the BB predictably called and led into me on the flop and turn with bottom pair, then called my turn raise to put him in. He spiked one of his two outs on the river. I shook my head and typed "lol" in the chat box, while I had a playable hand on another table. I don't normally get into chats.
The graph looks a bit tilty, but other than that one mistake I referred to, my big hands have been either coolers, beats, or reasoning mistakes on my part (i.e., bad play technically, not emotionally).
Bottom line, I think that one really good indicator for me is that although I've had a rough few sessions, I'm looking forward to the next one in a positive way...same way I do when I'm winning.
7 comments:
It seems like a few of us are going through these rough sessions where we play really well, but take some bad beats to chop us down a level. Hopefully, it all evens out and it seems that we are all taking things in stride, which is a good thing. Here's to being on the other side of variance for a lil' while.
Oh man, 2 buy ins is nothing. Seriously. I usually swing up/down 4 buy ins per session. AS long as your playing your A game nothing else matters. Keep it up
Way to remain positive, keep it up!
I agree with the others here, losing only 2 buy ins as badly as things have gone is pretty good. I know that sounds a bit wierd but I would probably have lost a lot more. If your not making mistakes for the most part things will turn round in next to no time. If you keep making the correct decisions even in a losing cause then thats all you can ask until this down swing runs its course.
Thanks for the comments, guys...for what it's worth, I did the graph in PTBB, not $$, since I'm going between stakes. So, it's close to 5BI down. Not that even 5BI is huge, but it's certainly more significant feeling than 2 :P.
It sounds like your becoming comfortable with the level your at be it 100 or 50, you can tell this because your not moaning about the losses instead your looking where you went wrong if you did. I think this is a good thing so long as you do the same when you win them.
Iam sure the month will turn around for you.
GL
marc
youre annalysis of the game and its various components are always a pleasure to read
i am always learning something about the games when i read this blog
thanks very much
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